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Two Steps Forward

Mallory Hagan

Well, the past two days have really been great. Yesterday I woke up ready to get things done! I mean, as compared to most of you I did a whole lot of nothing, but compared to the way I have been waking up previously, this was big. Huge. I made myself a delicious omelette with eggwhites, kale, spinach and a tinge of goat cheese (sue me) and then caught up on the news for a little while. Today it really hit me that I live in a generation that doesn’t know how to slow down. Everyone my age (that I know) is always in go-mode. I can honestly say that I have never, in my life, gotten up early enough to cook breakfast, enjoy my coffee, watch the news, and then relax. Or was that just me? Granted…I have absolutely nothing going on right now, but still, it has just been the best feeling to sit down alone at my kitchen table and think about the day, what I want to do and what will make me feel accomplished. No phone, no computer, no television, no book….just me. But, lets be honest, there’s a time and a place for television. For me, it was immediately after my delicious omelette. I mean, a new Scandal came on last night. I had to catch up….and so I did. :D 

Earlier this week I made plans with my pseudo dad/friend/Miss NY Board Member, Paul. We met at Hugo’s and had a delicious, healthy lunch while we talked about life. Paul was there throughout the entirety of my Miss NY/Miss America eperience and moved to LA a few years ago. It’s nice to have someone who knows and understands me and my life who lives just around the corner (and is an excelent cook). He also gives great hugs. I like him. 

I hit the gym after and then made my way to Trader Joes. I love that place! No… really. The amount of food I got yesterday for under $100 was absolutely ridiculous (and wonderful). Although, I have to admit, I didn’t cook dinner with any of my new yummy goodness. I had two more episodes of Scandal to watch before the live one came on, and lets face it, that takes HIGH priority. I had some of that delicious rosemary chicken from Wednesday night. I’m not going to lie, left-overs dont always hit the spot for me. BUT…it was that or miss the EPIC Melly/Fitz blow-out. Oh? You don’t watch Scandal? GET OUT OF HERE. The rest of my night was basically spent trying to figure out this damn Rosetta Stone (it’s coming, I promise)… and maybe watching Nashville, too. Don’t judge me.

Before I went to bed I finished Chapter 2 of The Artisan Soul, Voice: The Narrative That Guides. One of my favorite thoughts is this: 

Neither self-loathing or self-worship helps us find our authentic voice. It is only when our inner voice responds to the voice of God that we begin to truly find our own voice. 

How often do we listen to and embrace the negative voices in our head? I was raised in a household full of praise and encouragement. My parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles always made sure that I felt loved, accepted and capable, but even I, a kid/teen/young adult with a healthy self-esteem, am guilty of letting one boo be louder than 100 cheers (as Lance Armstrong would say). I’m guilty of it now! I know that I am more than capable of achieving the career and lifestyle that I long for. So are you, though. I can’t tell you how many times I have met girls, all across the country, who say “I can’t believe you just moved to NYC. I could never do that.” 

Why not? What is stopping any of us from what we want? We are stopping us. The sermon that Erwin preaches on this chapter is here. His life story is truly remarkable and she shares much of it in this segment. Let me know what you think. 

Now, this morning…I went all out with those goodies I bought at Trader Joe’s. I made a frittata!!! I chopped tomatoes, red pepper, yellow pepper, and some onion together and sauteed them in a small skillet. While they were cooking, I cracked three organic eggs and whisked them together with just a little bit of a “Mexican” three cheese blend. Now, I’m fully aware that Paleo calls for no dairy, but…baby steps, people. So, I poured the eggs over the mix in the skillet, let it cook through for about 4 minutes and then stuck it in the oven on Broil for another 5. Boom!! 

After this remarkable example of a healthy (mostly) paleo breakfast, I cleaned my apartment top to bottom and spent some time reading. I am so excited that I decided to add some life to my home! I think plants and flowers make everything better. I’m not sure if you saw an Instragram post that I put up last weekend when my Mom was in town, but I fell in love with Succulents! I found some and decided to pick up a few. Look how cute! 

Post cleaning spree, I hit up Equinox for a quick full-body workout! I wore myself out. Are you on Fitocracy? Go…… doooo it. My username is MissAmerica2013 and, there, you can see what i’m doing to get my hot bod back. :P  On the way home I went back to Trader Joe’s to pick up some spices so I could make myself a Ground Turkey Taco Salad. I mixed up this recipe a little bit because I didn’t have all of the ingredients to make the Taco Seasoning. I basically just used: Paprika, Garlic Powder, Cumin, Oregano, Chilli Powder, Salt and Pepper. Instead of just mashing an avocado, I actually made the Dos Caminos Guac with just half of one. I could probably make this recipe with my hands behind my back and my eyes closed. I live for guacamole. In addition, I added onions and red/yellow peppers to the ground turkey in my salad for extra flavor. I couldn’t find any plantains, but I do look foward to making those pan-fried ones soon. I love plantains!! In the past couple of days I think I have realized that I really enjoy cooking. I find it so relaxing and meditative. It gives you an opportunity to listen to the voices bouncing around in your head and, at the same time, create something beautiful and enjoyable. I really cherish that time in my kitchen spent alone. Frankly, I’m just realizing that I really like being alone period. It’s wonderful and completely freeing. 

Today was most fun, though, because I got to go to my first Dodgers game thanks to my friend, Jared!! This being Friday, AND going to a baseball game, I was worried that I would be especially tempted to cheat. I mean who goes to a game without peanuts and cracker jacks? Hotdogs? Bud light? THIS GIRL!! Okay. I had a naked hot dog. But…. That’s okay with me. We had a great time cheering (or screaming) throughout the game and were excited for the win in the extra-inning. Earlier today I texted my Dad to ask if it was okay to root for the Dodgers (Hey- I need to know these things!) and he reminded me that they were, after all, the Brooklyn Dodgers to begin with. It’s all coming together! Now I just need some Dodgers gear and i’ll be well on my way to being a true LA transplant. 

When I got home I was craving something sweet so I whipped up a “berry blast” smoothie sans protein powder. 

Ingredients: 

1 Small Banana

1/4 Cup Blueberries

4 Large Strawberries

5 Ice Cubes

2 tbsp Almond Milk (Mine was bad, so I used a bit of creamer…whoops) 

Honestly, I’m already feeling a lot better. I’ve always been so great at communicating myself and my feelings, I’m actually surprised at how long I have let this “funk” go on. My Mom suggested this blog and I am so grateful she did because even if not a single sould were reading, I am benefiting just by knowing that I have committed to getting up every day and doing something. Tomorrow I look forward to going wherever the wind blows me, and for now…I’m going to curl up on my couch and enjoy some form of crappy television. Hope you all have had a great Friday night! 

See you soon, 

M